Captain Negaduck's New Plan
Captain Negaduck's plan was foiled by Crane! Meanwhile, back at the ship, Ben Ali was swimming around the ship in circles. The duck captain was feeling ill because he had caught a cold from all that swimming along with a headache due to bumping his head on the wall. He has a hot water bottle on his head and a red towel wrapped around him with his feet in a bucket of hot water. "That cursed Master Crane!" Negaduck sniffled, "Making a fool out of me!" All of a sudden, the duck sneezed loudly before splashing his head in the hot water. He lifted his head out and held it, groaning in pain. "Oh! my head!" Although his head hurt, it was nothing when came banging on the door, annoying Negaduck. It was Stan making that racket. He was hammering a "Do Not Disturb" sign on the door with Heff holding a bucket of nails. The Collector came in with a hot water kettle for Stan and Heff to give to their captain. The Collector: Oh, a rabbit's life is a wonderful life "Your hot water, boys!" The Collector called out before Stan and Heff shushed him. "The poor captain has a splitting headache!" Stan said. "We mustn't annoy him." Heff added. They didn't notice Negaduck open the door as he banged the hammer hard on the duck's head. The hammer vibrated with Stan still holding it. Negaduck, who was dazed, spun circles in his room and collapsed in his chair, completely dazed with one foot in the bucket and one foot out. Stan and Heff entered the room with the kettle The Collector gave them and looked at Negaduck. Although we didn't see it, a dazed Captain Negaduck smiled goofily. "Well, captain, it's nice to see you smiling again!" said Stan, as he put Negaduck's other foot in the bucket. "Brings back the good old days when we were living a healthy, normal life: scuttling ships, cutting throats!" Heff shook a thermometer, and put it in his mouth. "Oh, captain, why don't we put to sea again?" Then Stan put hot water from the kettle in the bucket. "You know, there's trouble brewing on the island - women trouble!" He and Heff didn't know that he was putting an awful lot of hot water in the bucket, making the water in the bucket too hot as Heff said, "Stan and I wouldn't want this to go any farther, but Taurus Bulba told us that Steelbeak told him that he heard that Crane has banished Bijou." At this, the thermometer broke because the water was so hot, and Negaduck bolted from his chair, screaming in pain because his feet were red-hot. "WHOHOHOHOA!" Stan and Heff fell backwards, and Negaduck, who was very angry, grabbed them with the empty kettle over his eyes. "WHY YOU DODDERING IMBECILES, I--''' But then, his anger turned to surprise as he slowly lifted the kettle from his face. "Did you say Crane has banished Bijou?" "Aye-aye, captain," Heff said nervously. "Yes." "But why?" "On account of Viper, captain," Stan responded. "Bijou tried to do her in, but Crane saved her. Bijou's terribly jealous..." "Well, well!" Negaduck said, with a scheming look in his eyes. "That's why we ought to leave, captain," said Stan. "This ain't no place for a respectable pirate." But Negaduck had no attention of leaving Neverland yet after getting rid of Crane. Then Negaduck had an idea. "THAT'S IT, STAN AND HEFF! THAT'S IT!" "I'm glad you agree, captain." Stan said, thinking they might be leaving. "Quick," Negaduck said, letting the towel fall on the floor. "My cape! My best black cape!" "Aye, aye, sir," Heff said, as he dressed Negaduck in his cape. "The sooner we get going, the better." Stan and Heff moved Negaduck to the mirror. "Ah, yes, a jealous female can be tricked into anything. My case of hooks!" he ordered, whacking Stan and Heff in the faces. "Aye, aye, captain," said Heff, as he got the duck's case of hooks. "Here you are, sir. Your Sunday set, sir." Negaduck took off his silver hook and replaced it with a gold one. He also put a shining ruby ring on the hook. "If we impress the Ham-Ham, convince her we're eager to help her, the wench may chart our course to a certain hiding place." "Our best hiding place is the Spanish Main, sir." Scratch informed him, as he and Heff out the door, "Heff and I will set our course..." But Negaduck grabbed the woozle and heffalump with his hook. "And where do you think you are going?" Negaduck asked, poking Stan's nose. "To tell the animals we sailed the tide, sir." Negaduck shook his head. "Uh-uh. You will go ashore, pick up Bijou, and bring her to me." Then he threw them down and yelled, "UNDERSTAAAAAAAND??????????!!!!!!'''" The force of his yell, knocked the woozle and heffalump into their rowboat. "Aye, aye, sir." Stan and Heff said in unison, as they rowed to the island. Category:Fan Fiction